Welcome to the Nothing Store!
Welcome to the Nothing Store! So glad to have you here. Have you been here before? No? Well, I’ll just tell you how it works real quick and you can get started.
You see our menu above. There’s three categories from which to order. We have the Less, for first timers nervous about buying Nothing, but still would like to really simplify, get rid of money–you know, generally stop being a gluttonous A-hole–we have Zip. Every purchase on that menu comes with a canvas donation bag–put your crap in it, and get rid of it!
Next is the Zero menu, which is a variation on Zip, but with hints of simplicity. You give us your money, and we give you a gold star.
Finally we have Zilch is a no-nonsense, barebones menu for the rugged non-consumerist. You put straight cash on the counter and just walk out. No receipt–a raw experience for the unattached.
What do we do with all the Nothing Store profits? Great question. It funds the Something store. It’s where struggling neighbors get what they need–food, clothing, help with bills, healthcare, counseling, job search help, hugs, laughs, etc. You get the idea.
What’ll it be for you today? Excellent choice. Thank you for stopping in, and tell your friends about us! Nothing would make us happier.
This is a Five Minute Friday post, an unpretentious literary party. Join us.